How many times can you tell a story before you get it right?

Day 13:

time sets an illusion running/ a ticking of hours
you suspend/ life, a thing unwinding/ we pretend
solid/ as in you could reach me/ i could return
but we ripple/ we disappear/ we go out like dust
there is nothing easier and nothing harder
than staying alive

delight has little to do with light
at all/ we try to contain in a word
what it will mean to suddenly find
you missing from the story/ we arrive
at the crossroad from a distance
only we know

**********************************

Process Notes: 

We are a plurality.

Definitions: 

Plurality, or the subjective experience of many conscious selves residing in one brain, can be difficult for some folks to understand, especially if they’re unused to the concept, or are only familiar with the medical model, in which an original person (the “host” or “core”) develops other “personalities” to cope with a traumatic event.
Source: https://www.exunoplures.org/main/articles/skeptics/

Plurality, also called “multiplicity”, is the experience of having multiple people (consciousnesses) living in the same body together.

Each person has or can have a different personality, gender/sex, sexuality, age, race, species, and often different skills, opinions, preferences, goals, and wishes. Each is their own full person, they are not “personalities” or different “moods”. They usually each have their own name, and often a name for their system or collective together (sometimes the body’s legal name).
Source: https://projectinklings.com/resources/plurality


Plurality results in response to trauma. They are the container and protective system for the vessel. Unlike different facets or aspects of a personality, a plurality is distinct in its nature and in their function and interaction in the world.

The plurality is:
Vessel (collective: Megan )
ADDICT
CHANNEL/ SERAPH
HUNTR
[redacted]
HACKER

Each communicates and uses language in its own distinct way. Their personal universe is colored by their memory and interactions in the world. They are not seeking integration, and they in no way create a lack of wholeness in the vessel. They are already integrated as a multiplicity of being within one consciousness and within subconscious aspects of the vessel. They also look different and react different to the world. All of the plurality survives under the masking of the vessel.

This masking is required to be part of "society." It's so ingrained; it's almost impossible to drop as to do so would be a drop in survival access. Triggering or activating the vessel is the only time some aspects of the plurality will emerge beyond the control of the mask.

[redacted] is a "child" though ageless. [redacted] is the most dangerous plurality as there is no concept of accountability, containment, or understanding of long term consequences of their actions. [redacted] only understands that play is survival.  [redacted] erases and this erasure of creation aligns [redacted] most closely to chaos. [redacted] has no felt sense memory. [redacted] does not have access to emotions or feelings. These things are merely language, play, words, and operate as chess pieces to be moved across a board.

[redacted] built memorial.

The process notes herein are an attempt to make sense of why.

"The ego grieves but the soul knows that death is only a ripple in the ocean of time."
-Dancing in the Flames

I need you to believe in everything.

If we are going to survive this, I need you to believe and know anything is possible. But what is most possible is that the way we perceive the universe shapes it. The way we are in the deepest parts of ourselves is the universe. The quantum reality of the microcosm is the mapping of the macrocosm, and paradox is the path to truth.

Photograph: 

World Trade Center by Spanish plaza

Canceled: Online tour of the World Trade Center renovation in New Orleans

The historic World Trade Center building at 2 Canal St. is undergoing an extensive renovation as it is converted into the Four Seasons Hotel and Private Residences by developers Carpenter & Co. and Woodward Interests. The Preservation Resource Center will host an exclusive preview of the renovation in a virtual tour open only to PRC members. Overlooking the Mississippi River at the foot of Canal Street, the striking modernist building was designed by architect Edward Durell Stone and constructed in 1968. The property sat vacant for many years after Hurricane Katrina and was nearly demolished. The tour will be conducted by Raymond Armant and Ashley King of Trapolin Peer Architects and will include remarks by Brad Converse of Cambridge 7, the project’s lead architecture firm which has partnered with Trapolin Peer, Bear Cheezem, project manager with Woodward Interests, and Gabrielle Begue of MacRostie Historic Advisors, the tax credit consultants on the project.
Source: https://prcno.org/event/online-tour-world-trade-center/


JUN 25, 2019
Man jumps off 31st floor of WTC tower

An unidentified man apparently broke into the 31st floor of the former New Orleans World Trade Center building, which is under redevelopment at the foot of Canal Street, and jumped to his death Tuesday morning, officials said.

Plague Journal:
5.25.20

alone/ we can let the filling of what we are arise to the surface/ our degradation & shame. what if i had to be with another. an always type of masking to pretend i am sane. how to explain lost days, the way we fluid at borders, a type of ferry for (for?) crossing channels. we do go out, don't we. we take the body with us as the mind makes rapid connections, move through the land mines of emotional nesting. what i want to show is that the body was productive despite all the trials. we were attuned to the making.

"as you can see no world is realer than the other"
-Notley

you have a job to do/ and suffering is anything that leads you off the path

we are here to handle time/ until we are not


Notes from the [redacted]: 




Resource:
Parallels worlds of 9/11 and Hurricane Katrina: 
https://sundial.csun.edu/6001/archive/isthereacomparisonbetweenhurricanekatrina/